I, too, must be about my Father's business but how? I won't be writing the next Apologia, nor start being a catechist without training, much less a deacon. I need teachers; I need to listen and ask questions. I need to clean up my act as husband and father first. And I think I should see my spiritual director again. It's been a few months.
"Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see the distant scene; one step enough for me. I was not ever thus, nor pray'd that Thou shouldst lead me on; I loved to choose and see my path, but now lead Thou me on!" (From a hymn by Blessed John Henry Newman.)