Why didn't God give Himself a cool name?

I'm paraphrasing, but that was the gist of Patrick's question earlier (he's 9). Very thought-provoking, and the answer actually reveals that God is way ahead of that question when He simply said "I am who am" to Moses. What name can be given to the uncreated God? Sure, you can name creatures or progeny, but who can name the divine Creator? Even more amazing are the names He took when He became incarnate: "God saves" (from his Hebrew name, which we translate into Jesus) and "God with us" (Emmanuel). Why so amazing? Because those are names of love, relative to us! How is that not cool?