Why didn't God give Himself a cool name?

I'm paraphrasing, but that was the gist of Patrick's question earlier (he's 9). Very thought-provoking, and the answer actually reveals that God is way ahead of that question when He simply said "I am who am" to Moses. What name can be given to the uncreated God? Sure, you can name creatures or progeny, but who can name the divine Creator? Even more amazing are the names He took when He became incarnate: "God saves" (from his Hebrew name, which we translate into Jesus) and "God with us" (Emmanuel). Why so amazing? Because those are names of love, relative to us! How is that not cool?

Define happiness

So a UK study concludes that only-children are happier than those with siblings. But what constitutes being happy? It is a very subjective word, and if it is characterized (as in the quoted survey questions) as the absence of competition within the family, or adversity, then yeah, I might buy that. But are those the only things that constitute happiness? Are those even the notions of happiness that will ever matter to us in the real world? Hah!

From the mouth of babes and children

Nothing like kids to keep one's feet on the ground. For instance, after remarking about the empty box of chips that I never got to sample, Francis (7) offers me his hand, covered in crumbs, "you can have this!" Er, no. So Patrick (9) then shook the remaining crumbs from the box onto a small dish for me. Perspective...

Kids and their heroes

Just a thought that came to mind lately: who are the heroes our kids hold up on a pedestal? And why? What characteristics of theirs do they want to emulate? What choices in life would that lead them to? There was a time when I wondered why my kids bring home amoral (no moral teaching) books from Catholic primary school. Yes, they're about reading, but what's wrong with aesop's fables or Hans Christian Andersen? Aren't there any children's books about the saints and people in the Bible? Can't they learn to read with those as well as learn some good morals and maybe even practical wisdom?

But then again, why should it be the school's sole responsibility?

Fr. Val Peter: Love, Warmth and Discipline

This is a great podcast from Catholic Answers Live, on a more common sense approach to parenting that goes the extra mile to equip our kids with the skills and know-how they really need, and that includes loving them enough to teach them discipline.

Saving the Child by Saving the Parents

I recently saw a poster advocating the vaccination of parents as a reasonable means of protecting children. Fair enough: if the parents are immune to that particular virus, then they probably won't pass the virus onto their kids. There can be other pathways to infection, but at least that from the parents is eliminated.

Are viruses the only things that parents need to worry about? What about bad habits? Crass language? Being lazy? Gossiping? Questionable fashion tastes?? Oh but there is so much more that can seem harmless enough at first glance. What are mom and dad's favorite TV shows? What do they really think about this or that issue? What is their attitude towards this or that ethnic group? Do we drive safely and legally?

And what about faith and morals?

It was only in becoming a father that I was truly challenged to be a disciple of Christ. If I want that of them, then I must be a good one myself. If I am truly convinced that Christ is the Way, Truth and Life, then I should want that of them.

Fascinating questions from my sons

have included these:

• Would we have been born if Adam and Eve had not sinned and been removed from Eden?
• Did it really take six days?
• Is what my teacher said true, that it doesn't matter if you believe in God or not, or what you believe?
• Why did God give me the gifts I got?

And the discussions we have had to have surrounding my answers were also quite interesting. I think it is these discussions that I enjoy the most in parenting.

We are in complete control

.. or not. Carolyn Moynihan writes about the grief at the end of delayed motherhood and the promises of IVF. She is reasonably incredulous at "delaying adulthood". One might as well attempt to delay gravity -- which can meet with some success, but only up to a certain point. Motherhood at 45? IVF as a catch all? Time to rethink that.

Nature is resistant to many attempts at tampering. Time. Space. Mass. Energy. Particles. Things follow set laws that aren't easy, nor always safe, to mess with (report by Louise Hall, The Age):

The chairman of the IVF Directors Group and member of the Fertility Society of Australia, Michael Chapman, said pleas to the Federal Government to fund a public health campaign about the increased risks of miscarriage and pregnancy complications for older mothers and defects in their babies had fallen on deaf ears. This week the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists in Britain published a statement on reproductive ageing, reaffirming that biologically, the optimum period for childbearing is between ages 20 and 35. .. the example of celebrity older mothers .. gave women the wrong impression .. .. one thing that is not revealed in magazine articles is many of these celebrities are not using their own eggs, but a donor egg Figures show that the live birth rate for women under 35 undergoing IVF is 31 per cent. This falls below 5 per cent for women over 42.

Andrew Chinn visits our parish

And a fun time was had by all! Please visit his website. His music (and performance overall) made me feel very much like a child again (not such a feat, my wife would say). The concert was a lot of fun, not least was the participation of the children. The man was clearly a gifted master of music and entertainment. His faith came alive in his music, and was rather inspiring. God bless the man and his ministry!

Population control and children as burdens: Japan may exhibit the logical conclusion

Startling firsthand account and statistics from Michael Thomas Cibenko in this New Oxford article about Japan's population implosion: http://www.newoxfordreview.org/article.jsp?did=0209-cibenko

"The starkest example I encountered was an elementary school that had been built for a student population of at least one hundred. There were several full-size classrooms, a large gymnasium, library, playground, swimming pool, and parking lot. But I was astounded to discover on my first visit that there was only one student. One student with one teacher." ... "I later attended an autumn festival in my village at which elders traditionally take turns calling out the names of babies born that year. But that portion of the festival was very short and somewhat awkward, as there were dozens of senior citizens but only three names to be called." ... ".. I witnessed the bizarre sight of elderly women cuddling robotic dolls. It was explained to me that women buy these expensive dolls because they have no grandchildren to dote on. The dolls, which apparently sell in huge quantities, tell their owners how much they love them, and welcome them when they walk back into the room." ... "In 1950 there were approximately twenty-eight births for every thousand people in the population; in 2007 that number was only eight births per thousand. When one pauses even briefly to consider it, the difference is staggering. It is also interesting to note that the average number of children per Japanese family today is, low and behold, one -- the same as in China. The difference being that in China it's by state mandate; in Japan it's by choice." ... "Japan's population peaked in 2005, and will plunge from its current 127 million to just 89 million in 2050 -- a decline of 30 percent. In terms of median age, Japan is currently the oldest nation on earth. The median age in Japan today is 43 years old, which, from the data I've read, is twice the age of many African nations. Japan will continue to hold this title through the year 2050, when the average age in Japan is projected to be 61 years old." ... "An increasing number of Japanese leaders are looking for the "easy way out" of the dilemma of over-aging, as evidenced by the Japanese Association of Acute Medicine's 2007 recommendation to allow euthanasia for the terminally ill." ... "... in 2007, the government soberly noted that the number of children in Japan has declined for the twenty-sixth consecutive year. Over the past decade more than two thousand junior and senior high schools have closed due to lack of children. Many of these have been converted into homes for the elderly. ... more and more Japanese pediatricians are switching to geriatric medicine." ... "One recent poll revealed that a staggering 70 percent of young Japanese single women say they have no intention of getting married, many of them stating that babies are simply "too much trouble."" ... ".. the only real solution to the plague of depopulation is also rooted in another, yet altogether different, aspect of Western culture, that of Christianity. What Japan really needs to experience is a radical rekindling of the love of God, and as a consequence, love of children."

What is society doing to our girls?

Pornification, it seems. :-(

Prayer from the lips of children

I must say, I felt immensely joyful hearing my son Patrick reading from Psalm 85 (86) at bedtime tonight. And likewise when I saw that his older brother Justin had been filling up his reading journal (for school) with chapters from his children's Bible. Little saints in the making. If only their dad would stop getting in the way!

Thank you, Lord, for the three arrows in my quiver. They fill me with joy (when I stop taking myself too seriously), bring me to laughter, and fill me with hope. Through them, I catch a glimpse of the enormity of Fatherhood, a peek into the gift of Sonship, and a foretaste of holy Love. They hold up a mirror to me, confronting me with what it means to love and to be loved.

The shortsightedness of self-centeredness

The headlines of MX Melbourne today asks the question: what are we willing to pay for the future generation? The issue lies with government plans to share the burden of paid maternity leaves to the public, to the tune of $5.70 per week for those who earn about $50,000 AUD per year. The comments included in the report seemed to come only from those who consider the idea unfair to them, i.e., single people. Lack of reflection is evident. They have not considered that they did not pay for their own public education and healthcare. Nor do they consider who will pay for their public healthcare and pension. They have not considered the people those babies will become. Nor do they consider who will care for them in hospitals, drive them around in buses and trains, serve them in restaurants, health clubs, libraries, cinemas, banks and various places of recreation.

Just as long as they don't ask my kids for services and tax dollars.

The Golden Compass: masking a menace

The problem with the movie "The Golden Compass" is that it serves intentionally as an attraction to draw in potential readers for Philip Pullman's trilogy, "His Dark Materials." Why is this a problem? Because that trilogy is a deliberate and rather serious attack on Christianity. But so was the Da Vinci Code, so what's the problem here? The problem is that both the movie and the books are aimed at children at around 12 years of age. This is insidious enough that even the USCCB (bishop's conference in the US) has been deceived to the extent that their film review of this movie does not much mention the dangers of the books.

I think that this excellent post by the American Papist must be read in order to understand the implications.

Responsible parenting

Over at Testosterhome, a blog by a mother of five young sons, a commenter piped up about responsible parenting. The anonymous fella cited a saint and an example of abusive, drug-dependent parents, and said that biology happens.

It is true, we must take that responsibility seriously. But the number of children God invites each couple to have is unique to each couple. Many are blessed to have God's calling to have five or more (there are six of us in my family). There are also many who are only blessed with one child or two, however hard they tried to have more.

All I'm saying is responsible parenting sounds nice, but let God be at the center and let the number be strictly between him and the couple. No, I'm not saying that "biology" should take its course. In prayer, let God make his call. Because he is, after all, the author of life.

Marriage or Me?

This is a must-read from Charles Colson about me, myself and Marriage -- and why the "me" mentality contradicts Marriage.

The marvels of parenthood

It's been a rather busy two weeks in the Tan household. The children got sick (one after the other). They got better and promptly took in another virus. Patrick can be particularly high-maintenance when he's ill, and my wife lost hours of sleep as a result. It can only be divine intervention that, through it all, a notable thought actually came to mind: how marvellous it is to be a parent! Why? It is truly gracious of God to share with us this gift of being parents to our children. While my wife and I may whine about the way our children whine when they are sick (hmm.. we do whine just as badly as they), our appreciation of the experience is nothing in comparison to how our Father in Heaven feels when we, his "adult" children, require such high maintenance and patience when we in turn get sick. Or crash in some form, e.g., become depressed, throw tantrums over stressful days. I think I have it bad? How does Abba in Heaven feel with millions of squabbling, whining children all over the world, puportedly grownups but childish in many ways. If I had patience the size of a mustard seed, O Lord! If I had the generosity the size of a grain of sand. How patient and generous Abba is in Heaven!